IDENTITY CRISIS? Have you lost your company, your prestigious job, your ‘position’ in life? Are you feeling lost without that TITLE?

Dana Hee on IDENTITY CRISES...


* Have you lost your company, your prestigious job, your ‘position’ in life?

* Are you feeling powerless without that ‘identification?’

* Please know, that ‘perceived’ power comes from a title. Your true power comes from within!


Imagine this? You perceive yourself to 'be' an 'Olympian.' You know yourself as an 'Olympic Gold Medalist.

Then, you discover, that what you have believed is no longer possibly true! What do you do about that sense of LOSS?



Here’s a blogger note I wrote on my website in 2008!
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Thursday, June 26, 2008

Once an Olympian, Always an Olympian, Never Former...Never Past!
This is what was ingrained in my head when competing for the Olympics and there-after.


Is a 'Demonstration Sport' athlete at the Olympic Games REALLY an Olympian?

THIS....is the question. Kind of like...'to be'..or 'NOT to be'....eh? As a gold medalist at the 1988 Olympic Games in the demonstration sport of Taekwondo...this is a question that affects myself, my team mates, and many others. It has been a very confusing issue at times....so perhaps you can give me YOUR opinion.

I discovered some time after competing in the 24th Olympic Games in Seoul, Korea, that according to the IOC (International Olympic Committee), 'demonstration sport' athletes were not fully recognized as 'Olympians.'

According to the USOC (United States Olympic Committee), we 'used' to be considered Olympians (at the time I competed...in 1988). At the WOA General Assembly in 2003, WOA, the World Olympians Association revised its constitution and defined an Olympian as "an athlete accredited by an OCOG to compete in a full medal sport on the program at the Olympic Games. And now....according to recent correspondence with USOC president, one of my hero's, Willie Banks....

"Dana, Thank you for your email. Congratulations on your medal in the Seoul Olympic Games. I have been following a discussion on the definition of Olympian and I just discovered that the USOC Athletes Advisory Commission decided to endorse the definition of the World Olympians Association. THe only question that arises is whether any definition not accepted by the IOC is not really official. Therefore, the question is still very much open and debatable. As far as the US Olympians are concerned you will be treated as an Olympian within our organization until an official decision is made by the IOC and ratified by the US Olympians. Willie


Frankly, I find all of this quite fascinating, since I believe that there is no question, that...in my mind, I am an 'Olympian.' It is was I dreamed of...it is what I struggled so hard for...it is what I achieved...it is something that I will always encourage others to strive for and support...and it is what I will always feel that I am.

The fact is, I qualified for what everyone called, 'the Olympic Team' in my sport of Taekwondo. Our U.S. Team trained at the Olympic Training Center gearing up for the Olympics. Myself and my team mates attended all Olympic ceremonies (opening/closing/send-off/U.S. Presidential White House, etc. with NO differentiation between 'us' and other 'full-medal' athletes).

We received all materials identifying ourselves as 'U.S. Olympic Team' members (even the most important items...such as underwear and socks! ha, ha).' Myself and others were awarded our medals that commemorates us as an Olympic winner in a demonstration sport at the Olympic Games...complete with Olympic rings.

We received credit on television, magazines, and newspapers with the title of 'Olympic medalist in a demonstration sport.' And then, after the Games, I attended the International Olympic Academy as a delegate/representative from the United States with three other full-medal sport athletes.

In fact, I don't believe I, or my team mates have done anything differently than any other full-medal athletes....even the athletes now competing in the full-medal sport of Taekwondo. So how is it then, that there are some out there that say that myself and others in my position cannot be called 'Olympians'.....or may not be called 'Olympians' in the future?

Hmmm...... Don't you just love these complicated, yet meaningless issues that crowd our minds when we are trying to sleep at night? Isn't it amazing how the human mind wants to find that little 'Achilles Heel' to rein in our sense of pride and accomplishment? Especially, when the truth of the matter is that, it doesn't really matter if anyone calls me an Olympian.

When I remember how much I struggled and fought to change my life and make my dream come true...when I remember the agony and tears...the little triumphs, and then the setbacks.

When I remember standing on that Olympic podium with my stomach in my throat and a huge smile on my face, and my fist raised in the air for that one moment in time....when I think back to that sense of overwhelming pride in seeing my country's national flag raising to the beautiful sound of our national anthem...I know that only one thing matters....I am a champion....not just in sports...but more importantly, I am a champion in life.
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You see…I have finally realized, that it doesn’t matter if I am called an ‘Olympian,’ or an ‘Olympic Gold Medalist!’

What matters, is that I remember that a ‘title’ does not make me someone special! A title does not define me.

Who I am, what I have overcome, what I set out to achieve, what I accomplish, and how I use that to help others is what the real game of life is all about. ‘That’ is my true definition.

I am simply a woman who has come a long way, and still has a long ways to go. I am simply a woman who knows the meaning of hope, courage, and perseverance. And title or no, I will do what I can to help others maintain hope and courage and learn perseverance!

I know who I am. My name is Dana Hee.

“USING THE POWER OF YOUR MIND…TO CREATE WHAT YOU WANT!” PART THREE ‘BREATHING…AND…VISUALIZATION’

Why do doctors and others suggest to pregnant women to use breathing rhythms/exercises to help with their labor? Why is it that long distance runners are taught how to ‘breathe properly’ to help sustain their endurance? (“in-in” “out-out” with each step) What are WE taught to do, when dealing with asthma? (breathe into a paper bag) Why….are breathing exercises so important? I’ll tell you in one word. EMPOWERMENT!

Breathing properly and with dedication can increase our power to ease pain, increase lung capacity, reduce the constrictions of fear, and empower us to do MORE than what we are currently doing and experiencing?

Is there anyone reading this, that would like to do MORE than what you are currently doing? Well, breathing is just one aspect of empowerment. The other, is visualization!

Have any of you ever experienced that shocking moment when something you had ‘imagined’ would happen…. actually ‘happened?’ Perhaps, you thought that ‘this road is slick with ice.” “I’d better be careful!’ Then… ‘wham!’ You, or someone ELSE winded up in an accident! Have you ever thought to yourself, you know…I REALLY shouldn’t be doing this.” And then…you discovered that, “Yes!” “I REALLY should NOT have done that!”

It’s only my perspective, but ‘that’s’ just one example of the power that we have with our thoughts. That’s an example of the ‘power of the mind!’

Now…what if we could use the power of our mind to multiply the effectiveness and results of that which we truly want and need? I believe this to be ‘do-able!’

The reason I believe this is possible; I have outlined earlier with my Olympic gold medal accomplishment and one Hollywood stunt work example. Those are only two of the many times I feel I have been able to harness the power of my mind to manifest that which I want.

Now, can I do this ALL the time? No! Otherwise, I’d be a ‘gazillionair’ living on an exotic island and traveling to my many wonderful houses across the world. (Hmm…perhaps that’s ‘why’ I have chosen not to produce everything I ‘think’ I want! He, he). However, I do find that when I spend the time and energy with visualization, it has amazing benefits!

Visualization, as in how I’m putting this forth, is the practice of ‘seeing in your mind,’ detail by detail…that which you WANT to create. In my case, in my pre-Olympic competition with a serious back injury, I ‘visualized’ myself performing all of my attacks and counters with perfect precision. I ‘saw’ myself winning match after match. I saw myself standing on that top Olympic podium. Was I the ‘best’ fighter of that day? I doubt it. I WAS the best fighter for that period of time! And I DID stand on that top Olympic tier.

Now, what I did is this… (I may skip a few tiny details here…but u can research this skill later)

When I realized that my body was compromised, and that there were no ‘alternative’ solutions ‘on the table,’ and my team-mates practiced physically…I found a quiet place to sit. I sat so that my body was relaxed…yet allowed my airways to be ‘open’ for my breathing exercise. I cleared my mind by inhaling (extremely slowly, with ‘compressed’ breathing) through my nose with the resulting slow fill of air, going straight to my ‘belly’ (NOT my chest). Upon reaching the maximum of what I thought I could ‘hold,’ I paused, then I breathed in a bit more. Then in an extremely SLOW manner, I exhaled through my mouth in a ‘compressed’ mannerism (see video links I have attached). When I reached the ‘bottom line,’ where it felt like no more breath was available. I paused. Then I breathed out a bit more! Of course, then I began the exercise again.

NOTE: ‘Breathing’ exercises are not to be taken lightly, and often-times must be practiced and built-up to be able to do this effectively!

Now…after awhile of just focusing on the breathing technique alone (NOT thinking about ANYTHING!), I began doing a ‘relaxation’ and ‘clearing’ exercise. As I breathed…I imagined that my toes were ‘relaxing.’ Then I imagined my heels, my ankles, my calves, my knees, my thighs, my ham strings…and everything else….all the way up to my lips, my ears, and my eyebrows!

Once I felt relaxed and ‘clear,’ I then began to visualize that which I wanted! In the case of the Olympics, I was ‘side-lined’ with my back injury and unable to practice physically. So I practiced physically, in my mind! Move after move. Match after match.

Did I ‘see’ any visual results in those following two weeks of continued, persistent visualization? NO!

Yet when I stepped into that competition ring for my Olympic matches, I KNEW that I was ready! And when I began executing my moves…I re-affirmed to myself, that I was able!

Had I NOT done those breathing and visualizing exercises, I am CERTAIN, that I would’ve stepped into that ring….and felt un-prepared! I would’ve stepped into that ring, and I would’ve FAILED!

“When my first match was halfway over, I knew that although my body was not 100%, my positive mindset made up for it. As I faced my toughest opponent (Chinese Taipei) in the semi-finals, I knew in my heart, that I was good enough to win. I knew that I had the strength, the speed, the training, and the determination. And most important of all, I truly believed in myself. When my hand was raised after my final match to let everyone know I’d won the Olympic Gold, I smiled to myself, because I finally realized that I was, indeed, a winner.


Well, how would YOU like to be a winner in what you do? It IS possible! And breathing and visualization is just ONE way that can help you achieve this! The power of the mind is incredible! Why not harness that power to create what you want!?

Copywrite Dana Hee 12/16/2009


Links to help you learn ‘Breathing’ Exercises. My favorites here are the Pranayama exercises because the instructor explains really well what is needed to be done.


Great explanation of Pranayama Yoga Breathing exercise basics
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mvdiMjSgItg

Great explanation..continued
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TWnDHafou4&feature=related

Pranyama Yoga “Ocean Sounds” Breathing
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wHyZLtnobkU&feature=SeriesPlayList&p=DCD427CFFB5AA38A

Kung Fu Breathing exercises (Tan Jun Explained)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4tlZL95wqI&feature=related

Chosun Ninja Breathing
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MJIAKpeHgTY&NR=1

Kundalini Yoga “Breath of Fire”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5J5SwXpn8jY&feature=related

Kundalini Yoga “Breath of Fire”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zsEZylK8sDA&NR=1&feature=fvwp

"The Fly In The Kitchen Window" When the going gets tough, the tough get going!

They say that the definition of insanity...is doing the same thing over and over again, yet expecting different results. Hmm... Perhaps...I AM a little bit insane, because I am very GOOD at doing the same thing over and over again. I was born in the Chinese year of the Ox. Go figure!

Then again...I do believe insanity runs in our Louisiana family line...I’ve heard of my great grandfather’s irrational temper and ugly nature...I’ve witnessed my brother’s often, un-realistic approach to getting what he wants in life...I’ve been the target of my mother’s narcissistic nature of, “I love you...I hate you...I love you!”....and of course, I acknowledge my own bull-dog nature of not wanting to let go of something once I’ve latched onto it.

How DO we know when good ‘ol perseverance has turned into stupidity? As I sit pondering this thought while sipping my morning coffee...I silently contemplate the nasty black fly throwing itself at the kitchen window over and over again in its’ desperate attempt to escape to the flowers and trees outside. Feeling a twinge of embarrassment, as I am reminded of the hundreds of times when I performed the same mindless ritual...I grab up the fly swatter and SMACK! One less thoughtless moron in the world!

As I head to the counter top to get a paper towel to clean up the evidence of destruction, a couple of thoughts leap into my head... “What WAS I thinking all those years?” “Especially when the KISS theory (keep it simple, stupid!) is easily the best way to keep perseverance from turning into stupidity.” Of course...it took ME about 40 years to finally learn that! “MORAN!” I exclaim to myself as I wipe the window clean once again

Perhaps it’s because I’m a woman that I constantly want to complicate things. It’s not good enough for me to know that I need to put water in the horse tank. I need to know how much water was in there yesterday, and if it was close to being empty...why did my boyfriend not notice this and fill it up when he fed the horses last night. And just why IS the hose lying out across the lawn in the hot sun...baking itself to a shorter life-span? And surely...there must be an easier way to get the hay droppings out of the surface of the water...I mean...why can’t horses drink without slobbering and dropping their feed all over the place!!!

Ahhh....there are times I would give much to have the mind of a man. They don’t stop and ponder all of these issues. They either see the tank is empty and fill it up...or they never notice it at all! How simple! And much less stressful than what goes on in MY mind.

No wonder some men are absolute masters at the kiss. That’s their secret to blocking out our multitude of thought waves and getting us women to stop thinking for a few minutes. Fortunately...I finally learned to use the KISS to my advantage also. Not that I can do it all the time...but when I can, dang, it sure beats banging my head against the kitchen window!

KISS...aka... “Keep it simple, stupid!”...Has been my censoring device for several years now. When I begin to realize that I’m not making the progress that I should be making, I now take a step back and take another look at what I’m doing. Is there an easier way? Is there a more effective way? Do I need to do EVERY LITTLE THING I’m doing RIGHT NOW?

“Hmm...perhaps, I can break the problem down to it’s simplest form...and build up from there. Kind of like...if I need water in the horse tank...just go get the hose and turn the water on...instead of spending needless wasted energy fuming and analyzing things that are not pertinent to the immediate problem!”

Of course...since I absolutely seem to LOVE fuming and analyzing needless things and I’ve spent the majority of my life doing just that...I’ve really had to work hard at re-wiring my brain to force myself to KISS instead of shit bricks. Ahh...welcome to my world of the ‘ox!’

“USING ‘VISUALIZATION’ TO CREATE RESULTS!”

“USING ‘VISUALIZATION’ TO CREATE RESULTS!”

(“Using the Power of the Mind to Get what you Want! Part II”)


Somewhere along the line in all my martial art training and empowerment explorations, I learned about the power of visualization. I can’t quite recall how or from whom I learned the techniques from, and I cannot truly explain in a scientific way, why the process I’ve used truly works. But I eventually learned to use it to my benefit, over and over again for the last twenty some-odd years.

The results have proven unbelievably powerful! It was the determining factor with winning a gold medal in the 1988 Olympics when I had a debilitating injury.

It helped me overcome immobilizing fear when performing stunts, like a car-hit as a Stuntwoman on a Hollywood film.

Visualization enabled me to work through severe and debilitating pain and extreme temperatures when on stunt jobs.

And most importantly to me, it was the prominent factor with me learning to rise up from the ashes of child-hood to discover freedom, peace of mind, prosperity, and happiness.

Of course, being the very human and imperfect person that we all are, I need to develop and use this proven power, much, much more often! So my message to you today, is also a reminder and rehearsal of what I, myself am working on currently.

Now, have you ever wanted something so very bad? Yet just before you felt you might achieve it, the ‘floor felt out from under you?’ Have you ever struggled day and night, week after week, month after month for that goal, only to realize that it was not possible?

Well, guess what? We are MUCH stronger and powerful than many of us ever learn that we are! We just need to learn to USE that power for our benefit.

For example, our United States Taekwondo team arrived in Seoul, Korea two weeks before the Games, to do the final, most important training before our competition was to begin. Unfortunately, I had sustained a back injury at the Olympic Team trials a month and a half beforehand.

Although I had tried all kinds of modern medicine, sports medicine, and holistic remedies, the injury had gotten progressively worse. All of the doctors agreed, that the only thing that would help, was rest. But, there was no way I could do that, and have a chance of winning! By the time we arrived in Seoul, the pain was excruciating.

During our third practice in Seoul, we were doing a kicking drill where each of our teammates held a kicking pad at different heights, and one by one we would run the gauntlet of pads, kicking and screaming like banshees. When it was my turn, I started out kicking ferociously. “Hey…this was the Olympics…I was going to do this!” I was doing fine, until I came to the very last high kick.

As my foot reached for that pad, a lightening bolt of pain shot through me and dropped me to my knees in tears and agony. As my coach and teammates turned aside, I gingerly picked myself up, and limped off to the side. It was obvious to all of us that my Olympic dream was over before it even began! I was devastated!

That night, I agonized over this dilemma. This was the Olympics! I couldn’t just give up! I have sacrificed so much to be here! Yet, what could I do?

I knew that If I didn’t train these two weeks, I knew that, even if I could compete I would feel unprepared…and I knew that ‘mental’ negativity would interfere with my determination!

It was later that night, after hours of torturous twisting and turning in bed, I came up with a plan of action…or in-action as it turned out. I would practice by visualizing the things that I needed to work on!

So that’s what I did. For the remaining days before our competition, while everyone else practiced physically, I practiced mentally. I would find a quiet place, sit, meditate and visualize my attacks, and my counters. I saw myself executing everything with perfect precision and timing. I saw myself winning match after match!

As the morning of my competition dawned with my back rested enough to compete, I felt it in my spirit that I was ready for competition! When my first match was halfway over, I knew that although my body was not 100%, my positive mindset made up for it. As I faced my toughest opponent (Chinese Taipei) in the semi-finals, I knew in my heart, that I was good enough to win.

When my hand was raised after my final match to let everyone know I’d won the Olympic Gold, I smiled to myself, because I realized that I was, indeed, a winner. I had faced my fears, and overcome the limitations of my mind!

That was the first major result I gained from a simple visualization technique. Since then I have used it repeatedly in many different scenarios. In my next note, I will go into how YOU can start creating results with YOUR internal power…through visualization!

Dana's Olympic fight and win on Youtube ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=44gy17PKDnk )

USING THE POWER WITHIN TO GET WHAT YOU WANT!

USING THE POWER WITHIN
Part One


DEVELOP THE POWER OF YOUR MIND TO CREATE THAT WHICH YOU DESIRE!


The power of the mind is incredible! Just imagine what you can do if you learn to strengthen it! You CAN!

I believe that we all possess an internal energy force…or ‘chi,’ And it’s been my experience many, many times, that I can use that internal power to create an external, or physical manifestation of what I desire. What you truly believe…is what you get!

My first discovery of this was my Olympic gold medal win. I ‘believed’ I was good enough, strong enough, fast enough. I believed I was the better fighter! Since then I have used it over and over again. Let me explain…

For example, when I worked full-time in the film business in Los Angeles, I used it all the time. When we work, doing stunts on films, it requires a tremendous amount of energy. There are often long hours, little sleep, physical and mental demands. And of course the job requires constant awareness of what is going on around you.

When I work, I want to make sure that my actress is safe. I want to help my boss and comrades with whatever needs to be done, without being told. I’m constantly watching everything going on to ensure that I’m not needed in some capacity, and to ensure others safety.

The bottom line, is that you end up giving 100% energy 24/7! It’s like being on a constant adrenaline high. Sometimes we work for a day, a week, three weeks, and I’ve worked films that were 3, 4, and 6 months long! So when I come off of a film, I have discovered that there are often times where my energy level crashes after that constant adrenaline charge.

At first I used to fret about this, but I finally figured out, that it’s OK to let myself unwind…sleep… ‘veg out’…and do what I have to do to recharge my internal energy force.

Now the tricky thing about our business is that there are always 10 people and more waiting in line to take YOUR job. There’s a lot of talent…and often, not enough work to go around. And we get hired, generally through a simple phone call, asking if we are ‘available.’ If we miss that call, if we don’t return the call immediately, our boss moves on to the next person in line and calls them. You LOSE!

And the thing is…if you get calls, and start turning down the work, you are often crossed off their list, since it appears that you don’t want the job bad enough…when there are others starving for work! And if you turn down work for ‘them’…they will often discourage their buddies from calling you also!

And the more you DO work, the more you are show-casing your skills and professionalism, and the more you are in the fore-front of people’s minds. “Hey…you need a tall, thin blond? I just worked with Dana on XYZ. Why don’t you call her!”

Needless to say, in the film business, we become seriously attached to our phones and we become neurotic about NOT TURNING DOWN A JOB!

Only…we all need a break from time to time, to recharge our energy. What do you do? In my case, I learned to use the power of my mind, my internal energy, to create an external manifestation of what I wanted.

I discovered, that when I set my mind to the thinking of “Time-out!” “I need a break!” that phone would stop ringing. And when I switched my thoughts to “Ok…I’m ready to go!” “I’m going to get a phone call!” That phone would start ringing again.

This was not something ‘random.’ Once I got it down, it worked for me the entire time I was doing stunts full-time, for over 12 years! And I could go ‘play’ up in the mountain at my cabin for THREE WEEKS, and the day or so that I switched that power switch to the ‘ON’ position…I would get that next phone call! Bizarre? I don’t think so.

Yet the trick to this that I discovered through trial and error is, (#1) That you need to build up the power of your mind through training, just like an athlete does to prepare for a competition. And (#2), you have to truly BELIEVE in what you want to happen. When I ‘want’ something, but don’t believe it 100%, it doesn’t happen!

Imagine this…that the universe is made up of trillions of ‘molecules’ of energy. Everything you could possibly imagine exists within those cells of energy. Now…what if you could just reach out, grab that energy, and use it to create whatever you desired? Wouldn’t we all be richer, stronger, and happier? You can. I proved it to myself, and I’d like for YOU to prove it to yourself. To get started, you can learn to develop and strengthen the power of your mind through meditation and visualization. In a little while, I’ll talk you through this and show you how!

Dana's short video of car hits, and such on Block-Buster films! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e4OtAPYAL3A

INTERNAL POWER BEGINS WITH A POSITIVE MIND-SET!

I find that when we seek to improve upon our sense of self…we often turn automatically to the external tools of making us feel better…getting our hair done at the beauty salon, going to lift weights at the gym, taking that cool Harley out for a ride, buying/cooking/eating delicious and satisfying foods, and sometimes in my case…going shopping. Hey…she who dies with the most shoes, wins! Right? Aghh! (buzzer sound). Wrong!

Now if only my ‘natural’ instinct was to work from the ‘inside-out,’ life would become much easier. My life would be filled with much more peace, power and happiness. But then, I’m the Chinese ‘Ox.’ I often put my shoulder into that ‘yoke,’ and choose to do things the hard way. Fortunately, since I am aware of my shortcoming…I now to work at changing my life-long pattern of behaviors so that I can achieve higher levels of love, satisfaction, and sense of ‘self.’

It’s my personal experience and feeling, that everything we want and desire is out there in the universe waiting for us to tap it on the shoulder and say, ‘Come here.’ It’s my personal belief, that ‘God’ wants all the best for us. So then…why do we not walk on that bed of roses, if what we want is so very possible? I believe it’s a negative behavior pattern learned from years and years of using ‘external’ power to try and satisfy our internal needs. Question is….how can we change this and tap into the riches of the world that awaits us?

I have discovered that a positive mind-set is the first step we can take to help ourselves.

“Nothing will ever change without movement!” I’m sure you’ve heard that quote. And it’s so true. Believe me I know. Because I did NOTHING the first 25 years of my life to change that which I needed to change! I ran from anger, confrontation, sorrow, and rejection. Heck…I even ran from opportunity because I was afraid I might fail! I refused to ‘step-up’ and take my place in this world, because I was too afraid to take a risk…too afraid to accept a challenge. I was too afraid to even hope. It wasn’t until I reached an emotional crises in life, that I finally began to realize that ‘this’ was no way to live! And so it was…that I discovered that ‘change’ begins with the power of the mind.

In High School, I was pretty much considered a ‘loner.’ I was tall and thin to the point of bony. I was extremely introverted and spent the majority of my free time in the library with my nose buried in a book. And on the special holidays that many kids would get carnations or cards in their lockers…I would often send myself a couple, just to make it look like I had some friends too.

I imagine that things would’ve remained pretty bleak for me throughout High School, if I hadn’t of discovered, that I had a real talent and opportunity to be successful in the track and field event of the high jump. Discovering that I was actually ‘good’ at something began to transform my soul…and with the emotional support of my new Foster parents, I began to train and compete. It didn’t take long before my self-esteem and self-confidence began to grow. Soon I was interacting with other students and participating in after-school activities. I had found a tiny star within myself and I was learning how to make it shine.

By my senior year in high school, I was a different woman. I had fallen in love, and had a fiancé. I had a good job, and I had started dressing nice and taking care of myself. Because of the high jump, I had received a scholarship offer and a training sponsorship with a top Stanford University coach. By the time I graduated High School, I moved out to live with my fiancé, and started taking college prep classes at the local Jr. College. I felt ready to take on the world.

But then, everything turned upside down once again as I was suddenly hit with the emotional whip-lash of being pulled into interacting with my mother (who was recovering from yet another suicide attempt…which she had done in the effort to pull me back into her life), and then I was hit with the news that my grandfather had just hung himself.

To try and keep my sanity, I shut myself off from my emotions, and retreated into the safety of my day-dreams and the sanctuary of hard training. And as I trained with that top coach, I began to day-dream of what it would be like to go to the Olympics and win an Olympic Gold medal. Deep down inside…I just knew that if I could win an Olympic Gold Medal, then I would really ‘BE’ someone. Then I would truly be happy. But just as the going got tough, I let my old fear of failure get the best of me. I couldn’t bear the thought of what would happen if I tried my best, and discovered that, once again, I wasn’t good enough.

It was just like that old saying…that the higher up the ladder you climb, the further you have to fall. And I had fallen so many times before, that I had become deathly afraid of the pain I would feel when I hit the ground. So one day, when I was frustrated and discouraged, I gave up. I just turned and walked away from my dream. I never even said good-by or thank you to my coach. I was too afraid to face his reaction.

Only something unusual happened that day. For the very first time, after spending years running away from any pressure or conflict, I realized what a coward I was being. Hey…I had the talent, and for the first time, I had someone supporting me. It was ‘possible’ that I would’ve been able to make my dream come true. But, now…I would never know. Because I had just given up without even trying! That thought settled in my brain and began to haunt my heart…as the rest of my world began to fall apart.

On the surface, I presented my survivalist ‘game-face’ that everything was just fine. But stressed out with inner turmoil, and emotionally shut-down, my relationship with my fiancé quickly deteriorated and fell apart. I was on my own once again.

To hide from my disappointment and anxiety, I quit college, buried myself in work and began training in the Martial Arts. To everyone else, my life seemed just fine. But deep inside, I was falling apart at the seams. I didn’t return phone calls, or follow through on things. I avoided any and all emotional connections. I didn’t even go to visit my grandmother whose health was failing…even though I knew it was the last chance to see her. I was going through life like a zombie…keeping myself busy, and trying not to think about anything, or feel anything. It felt like I was all alone in the ocean, slowly sinking in a rickety boat full of tiny little holes. I knew that I needed to rescue myself before it was too late…but I didn’t know how.

Just when I was about to capsize, my salvation arrived with my newly found talent in the full-contact fighting sport of Taekwondo. I had been training in the Martial Arts for about five years at this time, and had just started competing in sparring matches. Placing second in my first National competition in 1986, I discovered that this sport was to be introduced in the upcoming ‘88’ Olympics in Seoul, Korea. The revelation, that here was my second chance to make my Olympic dream come true, hit me square between the eyes.

At that moment, it became startling clear to me that I could not just walk away again. I’d been given a second chance, and by God, I’d make the most of it! I was tired of running away from everything. I knew that I needed to draw the line and make a stand. So I swore to myself, that this time, no matter what, I would take this dream and make it come true. And if I failed…well at least I would know that it wasn’t because I didn’t give it 100% effort. I would know that, for once in my life, I did not let my fears get the best of me! Like a drowning person clinging to a life-raft, I made the determination to save myself by clinging to my long standing dream of Olympic Gold.

So at the age of 25, I took the little glimpse of hope that my newly found talent gave me…I told myself, “Be not afraid!” and I took one tiny step towards my dream.

(Dana's Olympic gold medal win. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=44gy17PKDnk )


Ok….so ‘that’ was quite a few years ago. Yet that one step changed my life, because it taught me that good things ARE possible. We just need to know this, so that we can begin to BELIEVE it to be possible. Well through the years, I have taken that one step with courage to make my dreams come true. First with the Olympics (in the full-contact fighting sport of Taekwondo), then with my dream of becoming a top Stuntwoman in Hollywood, and now, with my dream of becoming a great motivational speaker. Sure, I know that I may never reach the heights I aim for. But I DO know that it IS possible. So when I stumble and fall, I pick myself up, brush off the dirt, re-set my mind, and reach out to claim my happiness from the universe.

Increase Your Interactivity and Productivity by Holding Hands

Ok...my lesson from the past few days w/my good friend Doctor Mark Cheng is how I can multiply effective interactivity and productivity by 'hand-holding.' Sound strange? That's what I thought at first!

First of all...I never really had anyone holding MY hand while growing up. So the concept is completely foreign to me! Yet...I can definitely see it's value...especially as my goal is to reach out and help others achieve goals and happiness!

Can you imagine how great it would be to multiply YOUR results from YOUR interactions?

Hand-holding is a tool in interacting w/others. I have found that there are times as a Motivational Speaker, that I have not really 'reached' all of my audience members. So I'm constantly working on improving upon that. Dr. Cheng helped me understand an easy way to do this, simply by making sure to make that all important 'connection' w/each person in my audience by tying THIER personal experience and emotion into MY personal experience and emotion.

By tying an individuals own experience in with mine, it makes it easier for each person to truly relate and connect with what I am saying. This way, it's as if each person is holding my hand and walking with me as I share my journey and experience with them.

'Hand-holding,' is a step by step process in helping your associate, your customer, your client, your partner, your loved one get in touch with their own personal experience/feeling so that they can then relate to the power of your story, and/or the benefit of your product.

For example, I have found that it's our hopes and dreams that can keep us going in the toughest of times.

Have you ever experienced a moment or several, where you felt 'abandoned' or 'un-loved? Perhaps there was a time when you were a child, that your mom or dad was late in picking you up from school or practice? And with each passing moment, you got more anxious and embarrassed. Where, one by one, all of the other kids were picked up and went off smiling and laughing, while you just stood there waiting? And the longer you waited, the more your feeling of rejection, anger, hopelessness increased. Now of course, I'm sure you did eventually get picked up, or you walked home, and probably forgot all about it a few days later. But, what if that happened to you over and over again? What if you kept expecting for your parent to show up, but they never did? Wouldn't you feel even more hurt?

Now, take that feeling that you experienced, multiply it by 100 and you might have an idea about how I felt, so many times back when I was in that Orphanage. Here's one particular story from my childhood, after my mother abandoned myself and my two brothers when I was three, and we were placed in the Masonic Home for Children, where we stayed for the next nine long years...

"My mother did finally get back in touch with us, and would occasionally write or call, with promises that she would come visit or come and take us out of there to live with her. I remember the rare times when I would receive a letter during mail call, and I would gallop all around the dormitory, waving that letter high in the air.

And then there was the time that I actually got to talk with her on the telephone, and she said she’d be coming to get us the next day to go spend the summer with her. I was so excited, I couldn’t’ sleep all night long. The next morning I convinced my housemother to let me wait for her on the front steps.

So shortly after breakfast I sat down on the cold stone steps…waiting, watching, hoping. As each car entered the long circular driveway, my heart would beat a little faster, and I would shield my eyes from the glare of the sun and try and make out who it was. As each car left with their excited, laughing children…my heart would sink a little lower.

Finally the bell rang for lunch, and I pulled myself to my feet, and joined the small line heading to the cafeteria. “Perhaps later” I said to myself! After lunch, my Housemother pulled me aside and told me that no one would be coming to pick me up, and that I would remain at the home, once again, throughout the long summer vacation.

Late that afternoon, I sat in the deep grass and clover on the playground, beneath a huge sweet smelling Magnolia tree. The gentle sun was fading as I watched the few kids that were left, playing a game of jump rope.

As I thought about that morning, the familiar pain of abandonment wrapped its tight hold around my heart, and a feeling of hopelessness spread through my soul. Just then, the bell sounded for us to gather in our groups and head inside the building, so I automatically wiped my face and walked across the immense lawn towards the front entrance with it’s huge stone steps.

I walked up the steps with the other girls, then paused for a moment before entering the door. I turned around to take one last breath of the fresh sweet air before heading inside to the dark, musty smelling dormitories.

It was then that I noticed…there on the horizon in the gathering twilight of evening, just above the tree-line…one single star glittering brightly. Quickly, I closed my eyes, crossed my fingers, and whispered to myself…“Starlight, star-bright, first star I see tonight. I wish I may, I wish I might…have the wish I wish tonight. And I made that wish…just before the hall monitor, smacked me on the backside with a ruler, and sent me inside.

It was a wish that I repeated, year after year. And it was a wish that gave me a glimmer of hope…even in my darkest hour…for as a child, I believed in the power of dreams, wishes and stars. And my wish was for loving family, a place to call home, and a happier tomorrow."

Well, that wish upon a star, that 'dream' kept me going for many, many years! And that's why I KNOW about how powerful our hopes and dreams are to our sense of well being. They are the light at the end of the tunnel. They are the candle in the darkness of night. They are our salvation when we have nothing else to turn to. So, please. Whatever you do, do not abandon your hopes and your dreams!

'INTERACTIVITY' is the word that explains my day. INTERACTIVITY is the beginning of Success and Happiness.

It's been a REALLY hard lesson for me to learn, yet as much as I have fought this, I have found, that we are not alone.

Social networks...sad, but true...are one thing, that has helped to teach me the POWER of 'interactivity.'

There are times that we NEED to reach out and 'touch' someone.

The truth, is that we DESIRE to know that we are not alone in this world.

The action of interacting with others has proven to me, that the wonderful thing about 'connecting' with others, is that it has truly given me additional power to make my dreams come true.

The power of interacting has given me happiness in ways which I could have never calculated or predicted. It is a power that is both 'given' and 'gained' What could be more wonderful than that!

How can the power of interactivity help YOU....and YOUR business? Believe me...there are 101 different ways!